The actress posted a 12-word name for her baby girl to Instagram, hilariously sassing the crazy excitement about celeb baby names.
Gotta love Amber Tamblyn! The actress and her husband, comedian David Cross, have just welcomed their first child—a baby girl!—and the new mama didn’t waste any time taking to Instagram in order to post a hilarious send-up of the hype around celebrity baby names.
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“David and I are proud to announce the birth of our daughter, Dauphinoise Petunia Brittany Scheherazade Von Funkinstein Mustard Witch RBG Cross Tamblyn-Bey jr,” she wrote alongside a video of a tiny baby foot set to music.
David and I are proud to announce the birth of our daughter, Dauphinoise Petunia Brittany Scheherazade Von Funkinstein Mustard Witch RBG Cross Tamblyn-Bey jr. #TheFutureIsFemale
A post shared by Amber Tamblyn (@amberrosetamblyn) on Feb 21, 2017 at 11:45am PST
BAHAHAHA. Clearly, this mouthful of a moniker is not Tamblyn’s daughter’s actual name—though we can’t help but wonder if her real title is hiding somewhere in that mix. Could it be Brittany? Petunia? Beyonce? Ruth, in honor of RBG? Or is the hint in that awesome “TheFutureisFemale” hashtag tacked on at the end because Tamblyn—a vocal advocate of equal rights and female empowerment—plans to call her mini-me Hillary? If that’s the case, #We’reSoWithHer.
Of course, there’s also the possibility the couple hasn’t even come up with a name for the newest member of the Cross fam yet, in which case we’d like to suggest something like Chris—Jump! Jump!—or Red.
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And on the off chance Tamblyn’s post is not actually a joke, we think this commenter summed it up best: “She’ll be 46 years old by the time she learns to spell her name.” For the record, I’m 47 and I keep getting tripped up on “Scheherazade.”
Hollee Actman Becker is a freelance writer, blogger, and mom of two who writes about parenting and pop culture. Check out her website holleeactmanbecker.com for more, and then follow her on Instagram and Twitter.